Grateful

Kite flying.

Not really sure why but I wanted to fly a kite for a really, really long time now. Probably to enjoy the wind in my face, the exhilaration of running against wind direction and the sense of completion.

Thanks guys, for putting a full stop and marking the end of something that was never even meant to start. Finally, I feel complete again =)

It'll be one month before I see Malaysia again. Thank God that's pretty soon =)

staring at square things

Movies!

1. Tangled/Rapunzel
Watched it this afternoon with Suefay (whom I meet around once a year as our breaks coincide though we study at opposite sides of the hemisphere); the usual feel good disney production that was fun to watch! With hilarious comic reliefs too =)


2. The Social Network
Streamed this online and it's pretty interesting as it gives a true account of the founding of facebook (which is as essential for a human being who needs a social life) and it was pretty ironic cause my facebook site was on the other tab while I was watching the movie which indicates its importance in my life XD

3. Tron: The Legacy
Watched this with SH and CC and THboy simply cause we couldn't find other shows to watch and some of them watched Narnia already. The female actor's pretty cool but can't remember much from the movie; seems to be catered to the younger male audience though.

TV series!

Currently hooked on Fringe Season 1... The mystery just deepens with every episode and it's killling meeeee

Books!
finished reading Waiter Rant. Check out my post here.

But honestly still not enough time for friends and family and myself. Argghh I wished winter breaks were longer. I need TIME to chill before I face the world again. >.<

Happy Birthday...

to Jesus!

who came 2010 years ago to let us come to know Him and to forgive our sins and to teach us how to live a fulfilling and purpose driven life =)

This day is not just about x'mas lights, trees or even presents.

It's a day where we rejoice, and be thankful. and to have hope in His second coming.


We are the Reason (他为了我们)

 

Enjoy and Merry X'mas!!! <3

Winter.

So glad to have gotten out of HK just when the temperature dropped drastically; 2 days before I came back Malaysia, the temperature plunged from a comfortable 20 degrees to 8 degrees and I didn't have any down feather jacket and when I wore a pretty thin trench coat to go out, the hall receptionist asked, "哇你着甘少出街？" (you're just going to wear this jacket in this sort of weather?) so yeah, after that I changed into 2 layers of thin jackets because I didn't have one that was thick enough >.< another excuse to go shopping, right? XDD

And I will need to get a heater once I get back HK early next year. And also a thicker blanket because at the moment I'm stealing my roommate's as she went back early to Korea; lest I would wake up in the middle of the night shivering and listening to the wind howling outside the halls.

But mana tahu as I came back Msia to seek refuge from HK's winter, it has been raining for like 3 consecutive days, and it's the kind of rain that my mom calls "longevity rain" 长命雨 cause it rains at a constant pace for the whole day; not those short-lived downpours or the occassional drizzle. But still. A sign that we are slightly orientated on the upper hemisphere and therefore somewhat involved in this change in season =)

My plans for this 2 week long winter break:
Eat!!! (cut off ones means those that I've already eaten)
Nasi lemak, Chee Cheong Fun, roti canai, prawn mee, asam laksa, indian rojak, fruit rojak, popiah, bak kut teh, bee hun kueh, wan tan mee, curry mee, chicken rice, duck noodles, pig trotter, karipap, apam balik...

Study! 
yes, my classmates' kiasu-ness is getting to me. T.T but anyway I brought Robbin's Basis of Pathology back to study, and patho is my fav subject; I would NEVER read pharmacology or biochemistry at my own will. Ever.

Meet up with friends
But so far only met CC when she came to my house; SH and THboy still at their archi trip in Penang & Ipoh and I'm in desperate need of a social life T__T hopefully the college gang gathering will work out.. eventually...

Shopping!
with the excuse that stuff in Malaysia is cheaper than in HK! But my dad's gonna kill me soon, or worse still, freeze my bank account...

Karaoke
can NEVER get enough of it xDDD

Movies
the best deal for a movie in HK costs around RM 24; in Malaysia it's only 1/3 the price! WTH

Spend X'mas with family and church members 
=)

and so far, I've only done a little of the shopping and the study. and the eating.

And now, back to studying! =) and waiting for SH and THboy to come back from their trip T_T

peace.

am now defragmenting my emotional system at home.

will tell you when i'm done =)

done!

=)

shopping tomorrow!!! kekekekeke

waiting.

for exams to be over!

formative (not counted marks. at all) exam will be on 13th and 14th (next mon and tues) and then I'll be flying back Malaysia on Thurs.. yipeee!!!

But we had around 2 weeks plus worth of study break and yeah, it was long and excruciating. Names of arteries, nerves, veins, parasites, bacteria, fungi, virus, drugs flew out of my limbic system (controls memory) as fast as it flew in. And there's friggin community med!!! T__T

but then X'mas holidays are something really, really worth looking forward to. it's been soooo long since I've had a piece of roti canai in my mouth and I miss my college friends so so much. and besides, I think after exams, on 15th and 16th, Charlene and I might be going macao/shenzhen/shopping around hk!! FUN ^^

okay back to biochem.

double T_T

wrapping up 2010

it's nearing december and I see christmas themes everywhere! which reminds me of home cause at least I get to celebrate X'mas back in Malaysia~~ and I just want to sum up how this year has been for me...

in the beginning of the year, I still couldn't let go the fact that all my college friends were going separate ways with everyone doing different courses etc.

At that moment in time, I was also frustrated as to what & where was I going to study. Flew to both HK and Singapore to attend medicine admission interviews, and honestly I was terribly lost at that time, and church friends and God really helped alot =)

From Jan-July, I worked in a nearby kindergarten as a helper, and developed a newfound interest and perspective in kids. Though it was my 2nd time working part time, I think it did help me mature as I took on a more "maternal" role in taking care of younger people instead of just being taken care of by my family.

Finally got letter of admission into HKU med and that made me really happy and my dad really sad cause he preferred if I went Spore. But then NUS offered me my 2nd choice, bioengineering. Anyway after weighing the odds, I finally decided to come HK.

Throughout Aug, I was busy packing, saying goodbyes, spending more time with my family, eating more Msian food, going through a period of emo-ness but thankfully saved by the presence of Suat Hoon and Teck Hong, and basically not thinking too much about HK.

and then HK was... hmm. Hard to explain. Our Malaysian seniors and freshmen were pretty much awesome and fun to hang out with, and the locals are pretty nice but need getting used to. In many different ways. The culture is different as well; eg hall culture, campaign, how you dress up etc.

and here I want to say how grateful I am to have Charlene. She's the only other Malaysia Medic year 1 friend + we stay in the same hall, so we basically go through the exact same thing in terms of culture shock, missing family and friends etc. and she was such a great friend once I got to know her really well... Thanks so much Charlene, I seriously could not survive HK without you T.T

and now am having study break till 12th Dec. Formative exam on 13th and 14th Dec and will be back Malaysia on the 17th (might go tour around HK and/or Macao on 16th and 17th with Charlene!!! weee~~~)

so pretty much anticipating meeting friends back in Malaysia and also for friggin exams to be over pronto! studying in my room is SO, SO boring, like A levels' one month study break once again >.<

having Hall Annual High Table Dinner tomorrow night! off to study now ~

always little

Stumbled upon this James Morisson track:

Lyrics:

I was the one, 
Who would always
Jump in first
Didn't think twice
To look behind
Got such a good feeling, 
Just from playing
In the dirt
Once, 
When I was little

We could build a rocket, 
Fly to the moon
Leave Tuesday morning, 
And be back for noon
There wasn't nothing, 
Nothing that we couldn't do
Once, when I was little umm
Once, when I was little

Yeah I could dream more then
Yeah I believed more then
That the world
Could only get better
Yeah I was free more then
I could pretend more then
That this life could
Only show me good times
Once, when I was little
Umm ohh lalala

There was a time
When I trusted everyone
Yes I did
There was no place
That I would not go oh no
Spend a day on the hillside
Next to the holly mo
Oh once, when I was little
Yea once, when I, I was little

Yeah I could dream more then
Yeah I believe more then
That this world
Could only get better
Yeah I was free more then
I could pretend more then
That this life could
Only show me good times
Once, when I was little

Used to feel so strong
Even when they tell me, 
Tell me I was wrong
That I can't live
In a magic world
Cause it's time
For me to grow up
That I got to be
Like the rest of them
When I know
There acting up ohh

I could believe more
Then yes I could
I could pretend more then
That this life could
Only get better
I could believe more
Then yes I could
I could pretend more then

That this world could
Only show me good times
Once, when I was little
When I was little

So here comes the next one, 
The next in line
Stay as young you can, 
For the longest time
Cause those days flew by
Like a breeze
Just passing through
Once, when I was little

I don't believe that the more one sees of the world, the harder one's heart becomes. I think it's always a matter of choice. We can choose to go with the flow and do whatever the world does, and grow up. Or we can be different, and stay young with a childlike fascination and think the best of people. There was a quote somewhere that said we have to be different, to make a difference in others.

I don't want to harden my heart. I still want to laugh at lame jokes, squeal at cute dogs, cry in soppy cheesy romance movies, sing on my way back to hall when I think no one's watching. I want to be a real, breathing human. Not molded by people around me, or by the pressures of studying medicine.

Wait on the Lord, be of good courage, and he shall strengthen
    thine heart.  Wait, I say on the Lord.                                                                             - Psalms 27:14
We have a choice. I choose to be different. Just wait and see, things will change when you make the first step =)

pokchun

Apparently there are 5 must-do things once you enter HKU:

• Study (读书)
• Get a bf/gf (拍拖)
• Become an ExCo of a club/association (上莊)
• Stay in hall/dorm (住 HALL)
• Do part-time work (Part-time)

So far I've done 3 out of 5, and speaking of 上莊, we have something called "campaign" before you get to be Exco in any club (jong 莊)

Had my Caduceus campaign day 2 last night. Till morning. Friggin 6pm-5am! Including campaign day 1 plus mock campaign, it should be around 10 + 11 hours = 21 hours! *faints*

We were all dressed up in full suit, sitting there and being asked questions about anything related to Caduceus & the Medical Society. 

anyway the purpose of the campaign is for people, specifically members of the Medical Faculty to understand the nature of Caduceus and also the vision and concept of the new "jong" members has for next year's (2011) Caduceus publications (by the way Cadu is the name of the Medical Society magazine; so basically I joined an editorial board)

besides, they're the one that pay membership fees every year and so they would like to find out how their money is spent (based on proposed financial budget) and also a prospective overview of what Caduceus will look like in the upcoming issues.

the purpose of the whole campaign is reasonable enough, unfortunately the hours are pretty physically taxing. For some other major jongs in HKU Student's Union, apparently theirs can go up to 40-50 hours! Hall ExCo too. So churr. (update: friend in Rotaract Club HKUSU told me it's 48 hrs with toilet and dinner break in the middle, otherwise it's continuous T.T)

complaints aside. it was pretty worth it. honestly. we knew more about our jong, about our direction in what we wanted to publish and it also served as a reminder that it's important to take sheung jong seriously, that it's just not a temporary passionate spark but a steady flame of dedication.

after pokchun-ing jong, have to go pokchun Causeway Bay now to collect some stuff and attend church.

and pokchun study tomorrow =)

sudah letih.

i'm tired
of trying so hard to fit into somewhere that does not open its doors to me.
of keeping myself busy each day and telling myself that I had a fruitful day.
of waiting for thboy and sh to appear on fb chat and start accepting the fact that each of us have our own lives to live.
of hoping for something that does not exist.
of waiting.

I don't know what I'm looking for, but it feels like I'm waiting for something; probably a better tomorrow.

Oh well. Nothing to start off a monday with a good night's sleep.

=)

hou churr ah~~

Been pretty busy lately with non-academic related stuff, eg shopping for boots and winter clothing, preparing for Caduceus (Faculty Editorial Board) campaign, watching a movie @ cyberport etc, watching interhall football match and hall activities etc.

Churr.

I'm supposed to be catching up on the week's lecture now but out of boredom (cause I'm not sure if you're interested) let me just share some Hong Kong slang/terms =)

• 劲 geng -  can be used as a substitute for 好(hou) 非常 (fei sheung); eg 劲肚饿 (geng tou ngor) very hungry
• 撻皮 (tat pei) - lazy
• hea - lazy
• 出 pool - start dating someone
• 入 pool - just turned single (eg enter the pool of single people)
• churr - busy
• So - sorry
• su 唔 su - sure or not
• au - obtain, extract (like stealing, in a jokingly way)
• 劲过 (geng guo) - CGPA over 3
• 搏丁 (bok ding) - trying to score distinction (studying really hard for exams)
• 潜 li (cheem li) - study in the library all day
• 抽书 (chau xu) - like if people chau your xu, means they ask you questions from the lectures, like see how much you already know/studied
• 搏尽 (bok chun) - very "bok", either in studies or CCAs
• 浮 (fao) - opposite of cheem, like if you're very "fao" in hall means you simply join lots and lots of activities
• 上莊 (sheung jong) - become Executive Committee of a club. "jong" culture is really strong here as in they'll be harsh in some way before you get to be Exco, for certain hall and student's union "jong".
• 过 O (guo O) - go through hall/floor orientation

can only think of this much at the moment! Gonna go cheem now!!! >.<

halloween!!

Went to halloween @ Lan Kwai Fong with fellow Malaysians! The crowd had awesome costumes and there were plenty of cross-dressers around too =)

although it was jam-packed with people but it was definitely worth it! Thanks to our Malaysian seniors who brought us there and took so good care of us~

A bit lazy to blog much this week.. sometimes facebook says too much about me than my blog does! >.<

reflections

• some people in life are irreplaceable. no matter how hard we try to find similarities in friends we enjoy being with, each and every person has qualities unique and specific (omg sounds so enzyme-ish) to that person only. Be with people you are comfortable being with, instead of simply trying to fit in. It will be just sad and emotionally taxing. and those who mean most to you, keep them close to heart because, they'll always be there for you; if only you remembered to ask. Just a few days ago I was msn-ing with mama and we were saying that college gang were the BEST, most sincere and genuine group of friends we've ever met and got the privilege to know. We can't go back to our a level days, but it's just great to know that in this big wide scary world that there are friends you can count on, even with everyone busy with their own schedule. <3 u guys forever~~~

• no matter how grown up we get, family matters the most. their unfailing love, their meticulous care for even the simplest things will never change with the passing of time. they're the ultimate consultant, your most trusted friend, you shelter in a storm. love them, because no one else will do the exact same to you. besides, you owe them one =) my parents came to visit me last weekend in HK, and I brought them around to eat and to Ocean Park as well. So proud when mom said she was glad that I was ok and am more independent! It was great meeting them and having the feeling of being taken care of again nevertheless =)

• there are tons of people worse than you, but heaps of people better than you too, in all different aspects. Failure makes people stronger. We learn through failures. If you don't fail, you'll never know, and never appreciate the feeling of success. What do we learn, exactly? Firstly, we learn to accept the truth. Secondly, we consider what went wrong. Then we learn to let go, let go of that sense of insecurity that we're not good enough. In fact, we're never good enough. We can only get better, but best is still really, really far away. We win because of luck, because of effort and sometimes because of skill. But we lose because even though we're good, there are tons of people better than you. Heck, for all you know, they might've failed EVEN more than you! Try more, fail more, learn more. and then, try again!! you have no idea how many interviews and auditions I've failed since coming HKU. I didn't make it into HKU Debate, Student Ambassador and Medical Outreachers ExCo. But still, I learned a lot through the preparations involved, and also learning to accept failure too. Of COURSE it feels disheartening but sometimes we just need reminders that we're worth more than our failures. We are defined by who we are and what we want to be, with respect to ourselves and others. WE ARE AWESOME hahaha

• doing small things for others can bring you further than you expect. I was so glad when I saw Amanda's post on her blog =) chocolate can do miracles, really! and we celebrated my roommate's bday last night after 12 midnight... It definitely felt good to make someone's day! Therefore do not be bitchy because some days its effects may just rebound on YOU XD

Okay no idea where this post came from.. probably accumulated in my twisted system but ANYWAY congratulations for making it this far!! hope my sharing helped in some way ^^

what's wrong with meeeee

today I had the whole afternoon + night free but apparently my mood just isn't willing to cooperate.

another day goes by with me ignoring that growing mass of lecture notes while i aimlessly stalk people on facebook, meanwhile moping that MBBS has no reading week thus no going back malaysia thus no malaysian friends + family + FOOD.

argghhh the overwhelming sadness.

no wonder I can't study.

okay, back to stalking =))))

encounters

just learned today that it's far more interesting to explore uncharted land with a physical map in hand and boon tung sui 半桶水 (half a bucket full; means not very well versed) cantonese, because you really might not know what you'll stumble upon.

After attending a baptist church in SoHo, Central, I decided to drop by a 2nd hand bookstore that I googled last night.

Flow Bookstore

1/F No.40 Lyndhurst Terrace, Central,

Hong Kong Island, Hong Kong, 852

and the cute thing is, they installed those classic bells that will clinker as you open the door! and the feeling of being surrounded by books that are shelved up to 6 foot high is just SO overwhelming. too bad I'm just so inconsistent when it comes to reading.

I did pick up a few books anyway (who wouldn't?) they have some really new collections like The Story of Edgar Sawtelle, those Twilight books & quite a few from Paulo Coelho. Books that I got:

1. Waiter Rant: Behind the scenes of eating out by A. Waiter (seriously???)

I used to read his blog and his anecdotes as his life as a waiter is pretty interesting! Bought it for $68 (around RM 30)

2. Better: A Surgeon's Notes on Performance by Atul Gawande 

It was one of our recommended reading for medical humanities. I tried to borrow it from the library but it was already taken, so bought it at $58 (RM 26)

3. Mister Pip by Lloyd Jones

it's supposedly about a teacher in a tiny school, so I sort of took interest in it after my kindergarten job =) $43 (RM 19)

another random thing, I (finally!) stumbled upon a TVB artiste on my way to the bookstore! I was already on Lyndhurst Terrace (check address above) but I couldn't find number 40, so I walked into the nearest store just to ask for directions.

It was a store selling organic products, and as I entered, the woman at the counter frantically turned and that was the moment I realise she was...邵美琪 (Maggie Shiu). 

Actually I didn't know her name at that time, but she really did look nervous. Probably nervous of being identified, so I simply walked up to the cashier to ask directions to 40 Lyndhurst Terrace. In ENGLISH. To eliminate chances of me actually watching TVB dramas.

The cashier guy said he would direct me to the location later, and the artiste who thought I didn't know she was an artiste was really nice, cause I think she thought I was a tourist too (which I technically am, just a long term one =.=) and she even apologized to me! For keeping me waiting for the guy to finish putting the stuff that she bought into the plastic bag...

But anyway I guess I did the right thing not to "identify" her, cause being constantly under surveillance and being criticized for every move is very, very scary. And anyway at that time I still hadn't figured out her name. yet, so it would be a little embarrassing too >.< I didn't want to take a picture with her at that time cause it felt really odd. She wasn't promoting anything, plus she was doing grocery shopping. It just felt like I was taking advantage of her simply being there to gain a certain extent of fame. proof that I REALLY did see her.

now I just hope that she left the shop thinking, "phew, at last. someone who doesn't know too much about me."

Busy holidays

Did my 1st community service on Saturday! Went to Tsuen Wan Plaza (around 45 mins journey by MTR + bus) for the Health Exhibition that offered free health checks for the public. Conducted tests like checking their blood pressure, BMI & some lung capacity tests. Thanks mom for helping me practice with the bp kit back in Malaysia =)

 Charlene: I want to hear your hearbeat

Tze hui: Do you trust my skills???

Dinner =)

Plus celebrated my first birthday not in Malaysia...

 

 Cute pencil case + badminton grip from Charlene, Anthony n Alex!!! So thoughtful of them ~~ <3

Frozen Yoghurt with Sook Voon, Charlene, Alex n Anthony~  

with Charlene~~

bday cake from my dearest roommie!!! love u Jung Soo =)

Jung Soo

Cute hamster plush toy from Amanda the master cum senior.. haha =) it sleeps next to me now

but still dead dead tired from everything!! and I have class till 4 later.

Crap.

pics

what's good about HK is its abundance of dessert shops!! yum =)

 in mongkok

cute dog outside Flora Ho Sports Centre

i tried to order something as close as i could get to char koay teow, and it tasted quite similar but just not there yet... crap now i miss malaysian food more and more.. someone please ship some over to me T.T

arggh

i think i've studied for around 4-5 hours today.

OMG i don't think i've ever been so hardworking in my life, in a non-exam period!

i'm getting scarier by the second.

i don't want to forget.

i think i learned from some random movie that goldfish have memory that lasts for 30 seconds, and that's why they can swim so tirelessly in their aquarium for so long. cause they keep thinking that the other side of the tank is unexplored territory.

obviously if humans were to suffer the same fate, medical students would NEVER graduate med school! haha =) and i guess emotions (the good AND the bad) would be less rampant. we'll hate less, but we'll love less too.

am thankful that although i dont remember lectures as well i hope to, but i do remember why I'm here, and what keeps me going on.

i have to say this out loud.

i'm here because this is how I want to change people's lives. me coming to HKU for medicine is already God's blessing (although I didn't get scholarship hahaa but one shouldn't be too greedy) and i should use this opportunity to learn more, experience more and most importantly learn how to share. i've come here to be an efficient student, not a studying machine. i'm here to gain well rounded education but not get too carried away with social activities. i'm here because this is how i want to live the rest of my life. to me, a life lived solely for one's indulgences brings no meaning. i might as well just live on an island with unlimited supply of food and entertainment and just die alone.

the fact that i know that people care for me keeps me going on. facebook chat and msn sessions with the 2 busiest people in my college group (SH and THboy) cures my friendsickness pangs and reminds me that true friends are rare but ever so long lasting.

and I thank God for being able to remember. Memories are such a lifesaver (besides during exams of course XD)

now, moving on to gluconeogenesis...

lost.

When I used to teach the primary 1 & 2 kids in daycare, the kindy principal would sometimes come to help me out (actually most of the times T.T). once, when she came in, the kids' tables were in a mess cause I asked them to take out all their homework.

she said that if the table's in a mess, their minds and thoughts would be in a confused state too, like lacking direction and objective. so if i want them to focus, the table has to be organised, too.

as i type away, my arms can barely move more than 10 inches horizontally cause there are just stacks of things around me; books that i barely even read, girly vanity stuff (actually just a mirror =.=) all in 2 clutters (each on one side of the laptop)

its been almost 2 weeks since classes started, and i am still lost. we have an average of 2 lectures per day and i have revised around 50% of them... but it's so unlike me already! (cause i don't really revise until quite last minute XD)

am supposed to be reading up my common core stuff right now. and tidy up my table later.

omg this post is SO not inspiring. I need to get back that spark in my life!!!

today i saw a video on a community project whereby HKU and CUHK students visited the elderly.

and i cried thinking of my grandparents back in malaysia.

they said they would wait for me to graduate and come back, but it'll be 6 friggin years.

whenever i help an elderly, i'll think of them, hoping they know that i'm also doing it for them.

ah kong ah ma, i'll never ever forget you guys.

wait for me.

please, please, please wait for me.

hello

... from hong kong.

It's already been a week since I stepped onto foreign land & today was our 1st day of faculty orientation. It ends tomorrow, and classes start on friday (and some people are already planning to borrow books from the library wth)

Our class has a variety of students, ranging from 18 yr olds who got in through EAS Early Admissions Scheme (straight from HK secondary school) and some 20+ non-Jupas who've already gotten a degree (some from Cambridge & Carnegie Mellon WTH x 2)

Throughout the week, I constantly went on shopping sprees, though the definition of "cheap" in HK is so so much different. Branded goods are everywhere and people are on a frantic quest to conquer designer labels even though they're extremely pricey (like a dress that costs like 300 HKD AFTER discount...) that's probably around RM 100+ and they think that's cheap. T.T

You could probably say that everything around HK is expensive, ranging from food (minimum RM 4.50, and that's like the cheapest food on campus), transportation, fashion etc. Been spending the last few days with malaysians, getting stuff, settling down, signing up for a HK number, buying a new laptop, new shoes etc. In fact I didn't even bring my camera around since it sort of became a really touristy thing to do and I'll be here for at least the next 6 years so I don't think I'll be missing much XD

my roomie's a korean! and a hot one too for that matter =) in fact almost all other international students' roommates are korean cause they're 60+ full time 1st yr undergraduates this time around.. and they're only like 25 malaysian freshmen... sad sad case T.T

but we did have merdeka gathering last night! to meet up with the new and old msians in hong kong... no pics la sorry that's why this post is damn wordy XD

and oh ya I think one week's worth of conversing in cantonese paid off! Some were surprised when I told them I wasnt local.. so that's a good sign kekeke

more updates soon!! ~~ <3

all i want to say now is..

thank you.


to

suat hoon & teck hong, who have been there so so so so many countless times when I needed you guys, and spending SO much time with me when you guys could be completing your crazy workload and assignments. It really means a lot to me, more than anything words can express. Really. OMG I LOVE YOU GUYS SO SO MUCH T.T T.T

qiuhong and ern chean and chi en and a whole long list of church friends, who have been so so caring and prayed for me countless times and also doing tonnes of stuff to help me settle down in HK.. and for making a home visitation and praying for me too! <3


mom & dad for simply understanding and letting go! I know it must have been really, really hard =(


ah kong ah ma for giving me a packet of HACKS sweets just in case I had sore throat, and reminding me to study hard so I won't be wasting mom and dad's money T.T

sis for coming back from Spore to spend quality time with me. although i did use that weekend to see college and church friends too *guilty*

mama ly bs wy kk cc hl for the farewell card! and for everything else for the past 2 years~~ <3

yenwoon for recording the childhood medley with me and fulfilling one of my wishes before HK

mei jee for simply stopping by my house to say goodbye


chee ling and sin yee and kai han for meeting up for a cuppa


and of course,


to God, who made it all happen. I feel so blessed right now.

oh noooooooooo

time's almost up.


Now I'm busy
1. transferring 27.4GB worth of photos and videos (96% of them are college mates-related)
2. finishing Eat Pray Love by Elizabeth Gilbert
3. planning final meet-ups with friends
4. trying to spend more time with parents and grandparents
5. excited over HK end of summer sales *guilty*
6. being just plain emo.

nearly cried over what sh said over the phone yesterday.

*clears throat*

Gotta keep myself together.

Glad!

Celebrated teckhong's b'day 2 days ago in Sunway Pyramid. I was the one who planned most of it, and finally the one who got tricked!!!! by mama who told me she was coming back the following weekend T.T so so shocked to suddenly see her emerge from the bottom of the table! the conversation went something like this:-

kaykay: tze hui, when is mama coming back msia again? (she's studying in NUS now)
me: she told me the coming weekend lo...
*suddenly passes her phone to me, with mama on the line*
mama: tze hui!! where are you guys now?
me: at kim gary, sunway lo, why?
mama: i'm also there le!!
me: don't lansok (aka try to say that we have something in common) with me can or not...
mama: *emerges from the bottom of the table* i told you i'm at kim gary what..!!
me: *SHOCKED and grabs beeshuang by the shoulder*

but it was such a glad, glad glad reunion. Thanks mama for coming since you won't be able to make it next weekend which will be officially the last time I see the rest of you guys T.T

 what we do.. all the time. now we can't do it face to face, msn does the job XD

 b'day cake baked by me + suathoon + chaicheen! Chocolate tempation; recipe given by mama (check it out below)

 full attendance!!! and thanks so much for the farewell card.. i NEARLY got emo but stopped myself just in time.. told myself its too early its too early XD
and sis came back from singapore also to see me one last time before I leave for HK.. So blessed to have all of you.. really!!! xoxoxoxoxo <3
Chocolate Temptation
A:
20g chocolate emulco

50g cocoa powder

50g hot water

B:

250g butter

270g castor sugar

2g salt

C:

240g (4nos) egg

D

250g superfine flour

6g (1tsp) baking powder

2g (1/2 tsp) sodium bicarbonate

Choc ganache

150g dairy whipped cream

150g cooking choc

25g butter

25g glucose syrup

1. Combine A and mix well.
2. Beat B until light and fluffy. Add C one at a time and mix well until smooth.
3. Add A to the mixture and blend to form smooth batter.
4. Add sieved ingredients D.
5. Pour batter into 9 inch cake tin (I used 8 inch but it's still ok) . Bake at 180 C 40-45mins. (however, my cake had a HUGE crack on the top after 45 mins and the inside was still quite wet! so my friend suggested I put an aluminum foil on the top throughout the whole process to prevent uneven baking)
6. Cut the cake into 3 layers and spread the ganache on each layer, and also throughout the exterior of the cake.

Okay!! Gotta go sort things out. Pronto =)

p.s. currently reading Eat Pray Love by Elizabeth Gilbert. final read before HK?

hahaha

today i met up with suathoon and teckhong @ taylors.


and i laughed till i teared and my tummy hurt over some lame joke of asking them to design a jacuzzi that could double up as a steamboat.


am so glad that although people grow old, move apart, lead separate lives, some things in life just don't change.



=)

random emo-ness

oh crap.

'm starting to get the jitters.

did another collage on college mates that i'll develop and probably bring to hk to curb friendsickness T.T

okay teckhong gets the biggest chunk cause that's the nicest pic of us together and our faces are far apart so. that is THE honest answer hehe... XD

oh ya a video on the hall i will be staying in HKU. (RC Lee)

What I have been up to lately XD

Cover via Amazon

Movies movies movies! So long since I've written any reviews o.O

1. Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
This was pretty awesome! Joel (Jim Carrey--who plays a collected and contemplative character, unlike his roles in other movies) falls in love with Clementine (Kate Winslet--who already lost a lot of weight since Titanic o.O), who is this very impulsive, live-for-the-moment kind of girl. The initial excitement in their relationship finally wears off and Clementine's strong character takes its toll. One day, Joel finds himself talking to Clementine, but she cannot remembers who he is anymore. He eventually finds out there's a company, Lacuna, that specialises in erasing people's unwanted memories. Obviously Clementine had her memory of Joel erased to rid herself of the heartache of them arguing all the time and this was the easiest way out. Soon, Joel, who was heartbroken, decided to undergo the procedure as well and we are brought into Joel's memories and see how they were removed, one by one. Finally, though, Joel backed off halfway through and tried to resist having his memory erased and we see how the truth helped both of them get back on their feet again.

I guess the movie really brings us the message of the importance of memories. How it may bring us pain, but at the same time they shape who were are today. And erasing part of our memory may mean losing part of ourselves too.

2. Toy Story 3
It was rated pretty high in rottentomatoes.com, but I felt it was just okay. I felt that Up was better (I loved the black and white scene at the start; so nostalgic haha) Andy has finally outgrown playing his toys and decides to send them to the attic (and only bring Woody to college.. if it were me I wouldn't even have thought of them actually T.T) but the mom mistakenly brings them to the garbage man and finally they ALL end up in a daycare. There's this evil bear that tricks them to another room in the daycare in which all of the toys end up being physically "toyed" around by kids that don't know how to handle them properly. And finally all of them end up in good hands (a cute girl from the daycare) and the evil bear gets stuck in the front of the garbage truck as decoration XD I think the only part which I laughed out loud was when the Barbie dressed up as Ken and talked to the bookworm and the bookworm discovered that "Ken" was wearing heels which was supposed to give away Barbie, but he simply scoffed (like Ken actually cross-dresses all the time!! haha) Besides that it was just okay.


3. Iron Man
Robert Downey Jr. is HOT!!! For someone his age la. The ironman suit is definitely yeng3! haha =) It was sort of transformer-ish minus Megan Fox but an entertaining movie (yes I haven't watched IM 2. Yet.)

4. Dear John
Quite a soppy Nicholas Sparks adapted movie. If you liked The Notebook, you'll probably enjoy this one too. About a soldier (a hot, expressionless hunk played by Channing Tatum) who meets a girl (lively & humanitarian-type female by Amanda Seyfried; I still can't get over the impression that she's bimbotic ever since I watched Mean Girls! remember that she can predict the weather simply by touching her boobs?? haha) during summer break and they fall in love, but as soon as summer ends, he has to go back and finish 1 or 2 more years of service before he can finally come back and the girl has to go back to college as well. They keep in touch by writing letters to each other (hence the movie title, Dear John) but eventually the girl, tied down by social obligation (she didn't tell John that), decides to marry another guy and John is heartbroken. After many years, they meet again. They are still in love with each other but the timing was all wrong and.. I can't really remember the ending actually XD! But you can watch the movie to kill time la haha

6. Inception
Leonardo Dicaprio's acting skills seem to have gotten better and better throughout the years! So different from his boyish charm in Titanic; now he's like a veteran in the silver screens or something (I like him almost as much as Johnny Depp now. Just almost.) Undoubtedly I felt this was one of the better movies in this year and despite being a little lengthy at parts, it was a fascinating ride! I liked the part when the roads sort of folded into a box so they walked vertically too... No need to give a synopsis for this movie la, it's a MUST watch!! haha =)

7. Ip Man 1 & 2
Not overrated at all! Impressive kung fu scenes and actually got me interested in Ip Man (it was only thru the movie that I discovered that he was Bruce Lee's sifu T.T) and my ex colleagues even got me a biography on Ip Man! Finally it all boils down to the fact that we like to see chinese kung fu help in fighting society's evil and the influence of western culture =)

i believe

in eternity. in forever-afters.

In some random conversation yesterday, a friend mentioned that she didn't want to get married, but would like to experience a relationship.

But to me, being in love is not like an inventory in the "things to do before you die" list. Nowadays people change bfs/gfs almost at the same rate of changing their handphones (unless you have an iPhone I think, because then it would be pretty pricey XD) They fall in love, date, lose the feeling, call it quits, change fb status to "single", emo for a couple of months and look for someone new.

There's nothing wrong with the sequence, but won't it get a little tiring once repeated one too many times? Suddenly it loses its value of being precious and hard to find.

Call me idealistic, call me old school, but I believe that love is not a game. It's not something you can just take and put down that easily. I believe that one day, you will find someone that shares your faith, appreciates you for who you are and gets brutally honest with you all the time. Don't believe me? Watch 500 days of summer! Superb superb movie =)

I also believe, that no matter how many friends you have (in real life or in facebook! haha), it's truly truly important to have friends that will be there for you. On msn, on facebook chat, on the phone, in person. There are the ones that will last for life. No expiry date, and non-disposable ones. My favourites.

Thanks for being there when I needed you guys. And you know who you are. This one's for you <3

countdown to a new beginning

just booked my flight to hk. Aug 25th @ 7am by AirAsia.

22 more days to go!

=).

o.O

T.T

???

just feeling a teeeeeeensy unprepared.

if today was your last day

Yesterday was my last day working. After labouring/running around chasing kids/putting ointment for mosquito bites/hug them/carry them/eat imaginary food cooked by them, 7 months passed by as if it was just a month.

Lesson learned?

Teaching kids is not easy. In fact, teaching is not easy, because moulding one's thinking is always never risk-free. (think inception!)

Daycare (Std 1 & 2) was tiring, made me feel like a grumpy old teacher (you have to keep asking kids to take out their homework, finish their homework, don't play first, etc etc). To teach 6 yr olds, you would have to have a really really loud voice (so that your voice won't be drowned by theirs! seriously) and good general knowledge because they will "why?" you all the time o.O 5 year olds are alright but the boys.. will have just started fighting like boys and some of them will end ugly, either with cuts/bruises.. one boy even had his elbow dislocated because another boy climbed on him like a horse!!! 4 year olds.. ahh the bliss. Hug them all you want before they grow into 5 year old maniacal devils! haha =)

Oh ya a video recorded right before I left... The only time I almost cried yesterday! XD

Undergoing decomposition

I. Am. So. Bored.

2 more days to my last day at work & I'm already feeling pangs of boredom + aimlessness + lack of social life.

How will I survive the coming month before uni starts???

Please get me something to do.

我与基督的旅程 My Journey with God

 I drafted this a long long time ago but anyway feel like sharing now =) since I've never had the guts to share the good news with my friends o.O (p.s. sorry there's no English version.. it sounds.. odd ^^)

我不是出生在一个信主的家庭里。我家人算是道教， 可是没有说很虔诚的信徒，家外面有一个神台，厨房里一个神台，多数都是我的公公点香，一天两次，有时会听到他拜拜时会说 "祖宗保佑，芝慧身体健康，考试顺顺利利。。。"

以前，填表格时就填"Buddhist"， 因为我家人的宗教，间接成了我的宗教。我不知道自己信什么，我只知道，只要把考试考好，功课做好，听从父母的话，父母就会开心，我也会心安。

很奇妙的，我从小到大最要好的朋友都是基督徒，可能是上帝的默示我未来即将进入他的国度吧! 不过，我真正接触到福音是在我高一的时候。

一开始，我觉得难以接受。那位朋友告诉我，唯有通过耶稣基督，我才能得永生。唯有通过耶稣基督，我才不会死了后永远在地狱里受苦。那么，我即使一生行善，若没有信靠主耶稣，我也一样进地狱了吗? 那岂不是很不公平?

除此之外，她也告诉我，圣经是上帝要告诉人类的话。我那时在想，圣经也是人写的啊，他们怎么会知道上帝要说什么? 那些写圣经的人不会写错吗?

可是，我觉得基督教回答了我对人生最大的疑问:我们存在的目的到底是什么? 是为了金钱，权势，爱情，还是名利? 如果我考试得了第一名，毕业了，赚回来的月薪可以买一辆小车，之后结婚生子，孩子们都进入剑桥或牛津，生活安枕无忧，那我在临死之前会有什么感受? 把一生献给忙碌的生活，给儿女的前程，最终还是要面对死亡，而我努力的一切都不能从这世上带走。闭上了眼睛，一切将化为虚有。

养了儿女，他们会自己成家立业。赚了一大笔钱，终有一天会花完，或给别人花完。得到的权势，迟早会被后辈追上，被代替，被遗忘。世上所拥有的一切会改变，唯有耶稣基督的爱，的存在永不改变。他在我们婴孩时就开始看顾我们，在我们生活的每一刻永不离开我们，直到我们回归天家。这是让我感到很安慰的，因为我知道我生命里的每一件事，好的或不好的，都有上帝的应许。他没有答应说我们身为基督徒的生活会很平安顺利，但他答应会时时刻刻与我们同在。

就在那年的年尾，我参加了一个福音营，并在那时信了耶稣。不过，坦白说，我之后因为考试即将来临和家长希望我专注学业的缘故，我很少来教会。简单来说，就是单单表面上的基督徒而已。我的生活方式与以往没有不同，还是会追求物质与兴趣上的满足。上帝没有在我生命中排第一。

我中学毕业后，到college念A Levels，在这段期间，我那位基督徒朋友不断地鼓励我来教会，不过我常常以各种理由推辞。我不敢全心全意投入在教会里，因为我已经对教会感到很陌生，上帝好像与我无关。

之后，我发觉我对我的未来感到很无助以及遥不可及。我不知道我未来的取向，我也对我自己想要的未来完全没有概念。感谢主，那时候那位姐妹又再次邀请我来教会，我也开始踊跃参与了。通过上帝的话语，我觉得我真的得到了安慰。我了解到了上帝掌管一切，而且也计划了每个人的未来，只要把一切交托于他的手中，我们不需要惧怕或担忧。在唱诗歌崇拜时，我都常常会被圣灵感动，觉得上帝无比的美好，只好憋着眼泪把诗歌唱完。

所以，我感恩。我放弃过上帝，但上帝没有放弃过我。现在，我又再次背起十字架，希望一天比一天都能活出主耶稣的样式。愿主与你们同在。阿门。

This one deserves a standing O =)

2 more weeks left.

My HK student visa just came by courier a few days back, and suddenly it all seems so real.

Though I can't say my 7 months' worth of work in kindergarten was without incidents pissing me off/me pissing kids off (haha!) but it definitely made me love kids so much more.

5 yr old Yi Hen and her younger sister, Ci En, 3.

2 more weeks left. To another ending.

I guess love comes in many forms, so I'll used what's left to love them even more. =)

omg yi shuen made a "love cake"! so sweet =)

I wished...

I was busier

and then

it would be easier

to let go

of whatever was left.

thank you for a day's happiness

and I will thank you for the ultimate decision at a later date

I'll be lying by saying it didn't hurt

because I was so unprepared.

But I understand, cause besides the feeling

everything else was wrong.

But still

Thank you =)